Three vital shifts I had to make to go from destitution to 🥰IN LOVE🥰 with my life

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When I was searching through my experiences in “The Dark Days”, as I refer to them (ages 26-29 that were absolutely hellish), I found myself wondering which experiences would be most poignant in highlighting my three shifts.

Should I talk about what it’s like to live without a car in Los Angeles, when I took the bus & train for 7 grueling hours a day 6 days a week? Only to wake up and do it all again the next day.

Should I mention the time where my choice of where to live was so horrific and off base, one of my roommates held another of my roommates at gun point and threatened to shoot her if she didn’t pay him double the rent they had agreed upon? That incident began with the text “WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T COME HOME!”

Or what about when I was working full time at Princess Cruises, going to school at night and seeing clients on the weekend? Feeling stretched so thin I might tear into a million pieces, but still not having the option of pausing for even a second? With a child.

When in the middle of that time, my ex took me to court to try to get full custody of my kiddo, at which point I really did tear into a million pieces for a couple of days, when I was totally beside myself thinking I would lose (what felt like at the time) my only reason to live.

There was the time where we rented a bedroom in Newhall that was covered with ants, and had no AC. Filled with 116 degree weather when we could barely sleep, sweat dripping off us, ants crawling all over our faces.

There were the times that I was governed by naïveté and trusted the wrong people, which got me date-raped three times.

Or the time I partnered with a lady who claimed to be my best friend, and when she was imprisoned for embezzlement tried to pin the whole thing on me (Thank God there was so little evidence they didn’t even question me)

And more. So much more.

And I realized that the shift of going from destitution to being in love with my life could be summarized by the three things I had to do to get out of that awfulness.

💓 I had to release and dissolve all the beliefs that told me I didn’t deserve any better than that, and heal my relationship with money. Because I am the creator of my reality, so what I focus on and what I believe becomes true.

💓 I had to shift my frequency, because the wavelength I was on was attracting more of the same experiences, and I wanted something different.

💓 I had to reach out for support. I got myself as high up out of my mess as I could

Mindset, because when you are lost in the scramble of pain, confusion, worry and fear the only thing that happens is you just keep chasing your tail. And somehow, the situation keeps going from bad to worse, even though you’re trying to make it better.

And support, because when you are lost in the darkness you just need someone’s hand to help you up.

Help you out.

You need a light, a torch, a match to re-spark your belief in yourself

To show you the way that you haven’t tried yet. To help you see what you missed.

Because the thing is now that my senses are heightened

I notice opportunities

I spot when I’m being taken advantage of

I see, recognize and appreciate the good in my life

I notice and act immediately when my boundaries are being crossed

And I don’t entertain drama of any kind anywhere NEAR my vicinity. My life is so peaceful

It’s not perfect, by any means, because I’m still human

I STILL make mistakes

I still get caught up in my emotions

That sneaky inferiority sneaks up on me sometimes

But life is just different now when I have all the choices. When I have the power over my own life. When I decide how my life unfolds and what happens to me

And it’s liberating as FUCK

I can offer you support. And I can offer you a shift in mindset.

You just have to take the next step.

Abi 💜